On Thrusday.

Apparently, I am not attractive to many guys.
Some guys said that they could see themselves fucking my friend, but not me.
I was relieved, but then a little offended.
Hahaha!
They said my friend looks like a freak and I don't. ( You know... )
Hmmmm....

Interesting.

I am not sure how to take this information.

My Status

I'm at work. Chilling.
Ceremony is playing tonight and I love them.

I can't wait to see them actually.

So, I've been listening to a lot of Babyland and as of yesterday a lot of Capitalist Casualties because they will be playing soon at Gilman. April, I think. I can't wait!
In yo face, sucka!

Well...

Things have been well. I've been well.
I hate jerks though.
I want pizza too.

I wish I could write.

Mother

My mother was born free
With wind dancing across her body
and sun rays kissing her skin

But her children built concrete jungles
That weigh heavy upon her breast,
Spilled their brothers' and sisters' blood
On her with their never ending wars,
Built roads that bind her body,
And rip into her flesh
In the name of progress

But my mother's heart remains strong
And she weeps for her children
Who abuse her body
And violate her love

My mother was born free
And we, her children,
Enslave her


Ignore my horrible excuse for poetry. It sucks. I wrote this for a poetry class. How exciting. It's Ok. Not great.

Seriously

This weekend was amazing!
I had so much fun with all my friends. Friday night was amazing. I loved the fact that I woke up the next day went outside and saw a bunch of dishes just left out there. That was funny. Anyway, it was a lot of fun to hang out with my homegirls. They are hella chill. I completely just passed out though, woke up in the middle of the night, and left drunk messages to I think about three people. SORRY!

The show was really good on Friday night. I had a lot of fun hanging out with homies and watching some badass bands. Can you believe the lineup!
Zero Boys
Black Fork
ADT
Broken Needle
Crucial Cause

Sick shit!
Anyway, we all had to wake up really early... Hungover and everything. That sucked.

Hmmmm...

Well, Saturday was cool too. I helped a homie with his work and went all the way to Los Gatos to deliver shit. How ridiculous. It was fun though. We talked a lot and watched movies and shit.

Ehmmm... I had the worst insomnia EVER that night though. That sucked.

Let's see... Sunday I was exhausted and it was not as fun.
Breakfast was good though.

Well, that's all.

GREAT WEEKEND!

Please buy me these!

Man is the Bastard

· Sum of the Men LP (vermiform ’91)

· Sum of the Men anthology CD (vermiform)

· Thoughtless LP/CD (gravity) LP picture disc

· D.I.Y.C.D. anthology CD + previously unreleased songs (slap a ham ’95, deep six ‘06)

· Bleeding Rectum/Capitalist Casualties anthology LP (deep six)

· Mancruel CD (deep six) contains 3 previously unreleased Bastard Noise tracks and 1new MITB track

· Abundance of Guns 7” (mitb/s.o.a. ’92) Wood’s version has an extra song – all songs on D.I.Y.C.D.

· Backward Species 7” (ecocentric) on D.I.Y.C.D.

· Our Earth’s Blood part I 7” (vermiform) on Sum of the Men CD

· Uncivilized Live 7” (deep six ’92)

· split LP/CD w/ Mumia Abu-Jamal (alternative tentacles)

· split LP w/ Bleeding Rectum (mitb ’93) remastered on Mancruel CD – also on Sum of the Men CD

· split LP w/ Capitalist Casualties (six weeks ’94) remastered on Mancruel CD

· split LP w/ Bastard Noise (vibrator)

· split 8” w/ Born Against (vermiform) test pressing is 10” vinyl - on Sum of the Men CD

· split 7” w/ Agathocles (pessimiser/theologian ’94)

· split 7” w/ Aunt Mary (mitb ’92, deep six ’96) on D.I.Y.C.D.

· split 7” w/ Bizarre Uproar (mitb ‘93) on D.I.Y.C.D.

· split 7” w/ Crossed Out (slap a ham ’93) on D.I.Y.C.D.

· split 7” w/ Pink Flamingos (farewell ’93) on D.I.Y.C.D.

· split 7” w/ Unseen Noise Death (mitb) on D.I.Y.C.D.

· split 7” w/ Sinking Body (vermiform ’94) on Sum of the Men CD

· v/a 3xCD Old Days Nostalgia (soa) reissue of Abundance of Guns 7”

· v/a CD KXLU vol. 1 (kxlu)

· v/a CD Bottlenekk Fall ’98 Sampler “The Arena” on D.I.Y.C.D.

· v/a CD Under Your Influence (tralla ’00) previously released track: “Man is the Bastard”

· v/a CD The Virus That Would Not Die (alternative tentacles) “Subterfuge” from split LP with Mumia

· v/a LP/CD Reality part 2 (deep six)

· v/a LP/CD Fiesta Comes Alive (slap a ham)

· v/a LP Fear of Smell (vermiform ’93)

· v/a 10” No Desire to Continue Living (re-education/farewell)

· v/a 2x7” Anger and English (framework ’94) on D.I.Y.C.D.

· v/a 2x7” Cry Now Cry Later Vol. 3 (pessimiser/theologian) also on CD collection of Vol. 3 &4

· v/a 2x7” In the Spirit of Total Resistance (profane existence ’92)

· v/a 7” Reality (deep six ’92)

· v/a 7” Reproach (ugly pop)

· v/a 7” Revive us again (machination ’93)

· v/a 7” Son of Bllleeeeaaauuurrrrgghhh! (slap a ham ’92)

· v/a C-90 Ham Slappin’ Hits (slap a ham)

· v/a VHS Revenge of the Disabled Vol. 2 (will o’ the wisp ‘95)

· split LP w/ Bastard Noise – “Muzumuzusuru” recorded live KXLU April 1997 – never released

· split CD w/ Despise You recorded, but without vocals – unreleased

· reissues upcoming on Crucial Blast?

· Sum of the Men CD remastered reissue (deep six) – upcoming

· Collection of previously uncollected songs (deep six) – upcoming

Desperation

I'm desperate.
I'm having the worst time booking shows.
I have to be out of my house by March 15th.
I have someone breathing down my neck right now thinking that I'm in love with him when I'm not. (Really... I mean it. I doubt you read this, but if you are, I'm not. I used to like you an insane amount, but really... I'm really happy that you're in my life and just because I reach out to you like a friend doesn't mean that I want you in any other way. We're homies, ok? Now stop acting dick-ish.)
I'm having friendship issues.
I'm a horrible person.

And despite all the desperation and low self-image of myself, I'm pretty much happy. It's the weirdest feeling in the world. Could you imagine? Me? Happy? How many times has that happened in my life? Not many. I'm not even talking about the short-term, one week happiness. No, I'm talking about the going on three weeks on Tuesday. Crazy, huh?

I think my new tattoo really sums up everything in my life. My heart was and sorta is still breaking. It was breaking for worse things a few months ago, but now it's just breaking for family purposes and other shit... But, the ribbon tying it together is making it whole again. I feel like my life is getting together again. I mean, despite all the shit in the world that happens to me, I'm content. I feel like everything is changing. Time heals everything. Time healed my heart. Time healed it all. Maybe time will heal my desperation.

I hope I get a room!

Gourmet Pez....

In our age this poison is called materialism, bank account full, truly poor, spiritually emaciated, money as a means not an end for you to worship, your whole drive to live, unexamined, always scamming to protect your shit, all you love is sin, always worried how much you can get, this philosophy, always thinking someone is out to steal, abomination's son, all possessions hiding what is real, same with everyone, in truth i must deny, i examine and must ask why, know the truth and it will set you free. follies of the rich fucking the lives of human numbers, possessed by possessing kept by keeping, crushed by your own grasping hand, living non-attached, constant fun, mental children, giving til it hurts is the solution, total peace in this compassion. all your money wwill it buy you love? peace? hope? salvation? i say fuck your money. give us gourmet pez.




Can you find me the rest of lyrics????
I have no Man Is The Bastard lyrics.

Band.

I started a band.
We had three full practices and on the third practice we recorded.
Finally.
Here is the newest band from the Bay!

MRSA!


FUCK YES!

I did amazing things...

Not once! Not twice!
6 Times!

In yo face, sucka!

No one can do it like me!

Valentine's Day Massacre and Drone.

Read this:

http://ear2theground.blogspot.com/2009/02/you-are-sacrifice.html

Valentine's Day is a detestable holiday.

However, I would love it if you bought my broke ass some chocolates!

I am an idiot!

Sorry...

Ack!

Hey.
My dreams are getting weirder.
My life is being consumed with the thought of something.
This something is something that cannot be named at this moment, although most people do partake in this action.
Anyway, this is controlling my very thoughts right now.
I can't function anymore.
It's too much.

I'm Hungry.

To be reminded...

I was horribly sick today. I felt awful with my throat hurting and coughing. It was gross.

However, it gave me time to think. I thought long and hard about everything in my life. I say a lot of stupid and ridiculous things when I am belligerent. I say things that I don't necessarily mean. I thought about the things that I said on Saturday. I thought if I really meant what I said. I thought and I thought and I thought. I realize now that half of what I said was true. The other half wasn't.

I WAS hurt by somebody a while ago, but I've been through too much to dwell on the hurt. I don't like to feel that way. I really don't, so I've made a conscious decision to not wallow in my own depression. I'm not depressed. I'm fine. I just don't like to be reminded about it.

I love remembering my past. It makes me happy to think about it. I wouldn't trade those moments in my life for anything in the world.

100th Post

For my 100th post, I am going to put up a video of one of the best shows that I have ever booked. Nunca Mas (me) and UGZ (Jay Unidos) booked this badass bill with Iron Lung, Extortion, Lack of Interest, In Disgust, Godstomper, California Love and CARvsLOS!!!!!!

Shows Recently.

The shows that I have been going to recently have been amazing! I don't think I've had this much fun in a long ass time. So far everything has been really a lot of fun. The NuncaMas/UGZ collaborations have been going well. There won't be one of those for a long time, if ever again.... Who knows. I think we do a good job.
1979 Productions booked a brutal show last night at Gilman with Bastard Noise!!!!! I got to meet all the guys and everything.... Had a long talk with Eric Wood too... Carlos and I had a talk with Shane from Phobia as well.
Things seem to be going well.
I feel really bad about a friend though. I hope he thinks I'm not taking advantage of him. =( Bums me out.
In other news, my friend England from Eskapo came back from the Philippenes last week and told me all about the Eskapo tour there. Apparently it was a lot of fun and there was a lot of drinking. Ever heard of Happy Horse or Red Horse?????